works in progress

while big sister lay in bed last evening
shouting "baa baa black sheep" like a punk rocker,
and little sister remarkably slept on,
i sewed christmas clothes for the girls.
almost done - just a few straps, some hemming and a waist band to go!

for little sister: shirred tops and matching nappy covers

for big sister: pyjama shorts and cord skirts

advent 3: prop construction

the things you can do when both girls are asleep

(and so you can't use the vacuum cleaner.)
i would love to work in prop construction on playschool!
this stable is in preparation for our advent story-telling
set to begin on thursday

breaking through

jig-sawing a window in the play-oven door

self-sewn pumpkins shooting in our garden


two little bottom teeth, finally emerged

a wee bit insane?

we're normal. what are you talking about?

i think that some people, namely my mum and my brother, suspect that i am going a wee bit insane following my recent posts on giving sugar and santa the flick. (well, living in a little house and doing things repetitively like rocking the pram could possibly be sending me a little barmy. and having been wanting to move to the country all year but having no control over when we're able to go and so living in limbo land has also turned me into a major control freak over the little things, and especially over stuff to do with christmas. sigh.) i am also really just trying very hard to be a thoughtful mother, while i have the opportunity to do some thinking and am not living by the seat of my pants.

i've had some supremely useful conversations this weekend, and have come to a more moderate and satisfying (for me) position on the big fat red guy. my decision is to, for the most part, leave the initiating of santa-talk to the girls, and i'll answer their questions as they come. we will celebrate sinterklaas in 2012, and i will explain to the girls about who saint nicholas was and what he was on about, so when they do ask about santa, i will explain him in relation to saint nicholas. i will continue, however, to maintain my no-red and white-christmas decoration policy.

it was pointed out that perhaps i have been over-estimating the impact of the whole santa issue, and underestimating the impact of all the other jesus-focused elements of celebrating christmas. touche. i needed to hear that. i guess in my fear of my girls turning into entitled, greedy brats who don't value the things that they have (which is the lifestyle i associate with santa), i forgot that God is powerful, wise, merciful and kind, that he answers prayers, that Jesus has already claimed victory over sin, and that God is at work in the world all the time. so i needn't worry so much.

i have also had ample opportunity this weekend to put my convictions about sugar to the test in big sister's life, as our saturday consisted of a christmas party, a birthday party and a thanksgiving dinner, all with sugar-laden goodies to be had. though i didn't say this in my previous post, the fifth "rule" of david gillespie's diet is that "party food is for parties," which means that it's okay to indulge in some sugary delights when celebrating something worth celebrating - it's just not okay to indulge in them as part of your normal eating pattern. (and if you're a sugar addict, which is what he contends most people are, you'll most likely regret indulging in the sugar because you'll have to detox all over again. anyway...)

so big sister got to eat lollies, iced-biscuits, cake, chocolate, juice and ice-cream - the last three of which she had never really even had before. (she didn't really like the juice, so i am secretly pleased about that.) i actually felt okay about her eating these things in celebration, but i am still convinced that i don't want them in our house and that it's not really okay for playgroup morning tea to consist of sugary treats. the gillespie book contains recipes for party foods (and other normal foods) that are made fructose-free by using alternate ingredients (such as dextrose and glucose syrup, which each contain the glucose part of sugar but not the evil fructose part), so it is allegedly possible to make these celebratory foods in a low-fructose version. will be testing these recipes out soon.

what to tell the girls about the big fat red guy

image from here.

i've been going around in circles lately, thinking about how to approach the whole santa-thing with my girls. i feel like i've got another year to figure things out before big sister starts asking questions (or knows anyone else who would tell her about santa), so i'm glad for the extra time to sort things through. in an ideal world, i would not tell the girls about santa at all, and to us he wouldn't exist or have any part in our celebration of christmas. sadly, our world is not this way!

my second preference is to tell the girls that santa is a story or a game, which other families tell and play at christmas time. but i don't really want big sister to be the one to tell other children that santa isn't real, when their parents still want them to believe that he is. a reaction i have to this train of thought, though, is that i'm sure there are many parents who would be prepared to tell their children that the story of jesus is just a story, and wouldn't mind if their children told my girls that jesus isn't real. it doesn't bother me if other kids tell my girls that jesus isn't real, because we know that he is and i am happy to talk with the girls about how we know that jesus is more than just a story. anyway...

my third idea is for our family to observe sinterklaas, which is a dutch christmas tradition, rather than following the australian tradition of having santa claus visit on christmas eve. i need to read a bit more about sinterklaas, but i like the fact that it is celebrated earlier in december (so that christmas day can be exciting simply because it is the day we celebrate jesus' birth) and that the gifts given by santa are extremely modest. i think it would also be a great way to cherish our family's dutch heritage (if you didn't know, husband's family came to australia from the netherlands when he was 8, and so the girls are half dutch.) the problems i can see with this approach are still how to explain about santa (whether to say that it's a game or to pretend for a while that it is real, which i don't want to do) and then how the girls would explain to their friends that santa visits them early just because they are half dutch.

so i'm still confused. i like the story of saint nicholas, who gave gifts to people in genuine need in his village, and would be happy to observe something that celebrates his compassion and generosity. but i don't know how to do that without buying into the extremely-bastardised version we know today as santa claus. any thoughts?

big sister's rain dance

from last friday evening, during a thunderstorm...

bye bye sugar

image from here.

two nights ago, we ran out of milo and i'm not going to buy anymore. we've also run out of dried fruit, sweet chilli sauce, orange juice and sweetened yoghurt, and i'm not going to buy anymore of those either. and when we run out of cordial, honey, golden syrup, icing sugar, etc, they won't be making their way onto my shopping list again.

i recently read 'the sweet poison quit plan: how to kick the sugar habit and lose weight,' by david gillespie. i'd read a couple of blog posts about it and since it was available at our local library, i decided to borrow it and see for myself what it had to say. i found it to be extremely compelling, relevant and able to pull together the fragmented understandings and wonderings about the role of sugar in our diet that i'd had floating in my mind already - in much the same way that hearing the gospel of Jesus explained clearly brought my worldview together into a sensible whole - which was quite a surprising experience!

gillespie asserts that fructose (which is basically the non-glucose half of sugar) causes the serious health problems we're seeing in our society, because we're consuming it at much greater levels than nature intended and in a non-natural way (i.e. without the associated fibre that helps our bodies to deal with the fructose in a healthy way - so consuming fructose in an orange is okay, but consuming fructose in orange juice is not okay because the fibre of the fruit is missing.) apparently fructose causes bad things to happen in our bodies when it is broken down, in a way that glucose does not. so not all sugar is bad - glucose is what fuels our brain, among other important things - only fructose is to be avoided.

i'll leave you to read the book for yourselves, but the thing that really spoke to me from this book/dietary theory was the assertion that fructose is responsible for messing with our brain's ability to tell our stomach that we've had enough to eat when we've consumed an appropriate amount of calories. this disconnect is what causes us to desire food when we know we don't actually need it, and to walk around in a perpetual state of non-satisfiable hunger. omg. that is me.

well, it was me about 3 weeks ago. since then, i have limited the amount of fructose i consume, and i'm already feeling much more in control of my desire for food. husband has read the book as well and also found it compelling, so we're planning to attempt to cut fructose out completely as a family after the christmas holidays. i don't think it will really be that hard - our current breakfasts, lunches and dinners are already very low in fructose, and don't really need much tweaking. our snacking is where the challenge will lie, but we've already switched to more savoury snack options (nuts, crackers with cheese or dip, corn chips, popcorn, toast with vegemite or avocado, etc) and life is good.

i've noticed that big sister's mood has been much more stable in the past 3 weeks - i haven't really needed to try out anything i've been reading about in the child wrangling department - and i put this down to reduced levels of sugar. i remember now the first few times she had sweetened yogurt as a baby/toddler - boy, did she cry whenever the tub was finished. and for several months this year i'd been using muffin bars to convince her to get into the pram when she didn't want to, and it always made her crazy. i'm glad she's only ever drunk water or milk up til now, because her snacks are really the only change we've needed to make, and she seems quite happy. her new favourite thing is homemade yogurt icy-poles - just natural yogurt with a bit of vanilla essence for flavour, frozen in icy-pole moulds. easy.

the book's title refers to weight loss, but i'm the only one in this house with any weight to lose, so we'll see what happens in that department. it's not particularly a motivator for us, though i do have a bag of lovely pre-motherhood clothes that i would quite like to wear again some day soon.

and if anyone who doesn't know me in real life is reading this blog, i most certainly didn't get paid for this post - i don't get paid to do anything! (except have babies, raise them and get them immunised, it seems...)

the life and times of little sister

sitting unassisted (with soft places to fall)
babbling while eating (very little is swallowed)
trashing the bottom toy shelf with her feet
shrieking to get attention
eating grass whenever the chance arises
rolling far and wide - no picnic blanket is big enough
the life and times of little sister

advent 2: craft activities

when i sat down to plan our advent, i tried to use the idea of "in" (to ourselves), "out" (to others/the community) and "up" (to God) to provide some kind of balance. and i wasn't too sure where craft activities fitted in to this model, but i knew i wanted to do some with big sister. i decided they would count as "in," because the joy in making would be ours. but our minister preached yesterday about the spiritual discipline of celebration, and i'm now convinced that our craft activities (which will produce christmas decorations) also count as "out" and perhaps even a little as "up," as they will encourage us and those who enter our home to celebrate more fully and more joyfully the meaning of christmas. below are a couple of the activities we plan to do:

paper lanterns will be the centre piece above our table when little sister's godparents and their beloved come for lunch in december. good thing we've got that jolly jumper hook in the ceiling already! from here

big sister is obsessed with having me trace around her hand and my hand whenever the textas are out, so i thought she'd enjoy making this wreath. from here

:: some updates: so toilet training has been a bit of a false start. no clue of knowing in advance that she needs to go = mummy frequently asking big sister if she wants to use the potty = annoyed and defiant big sister. will try again in january. and i've already made the felt ball garland - after an evening of shirring frustration and much wasted elastic, the instant gratification desiring, generation y part of me was desperate to finish a project, so those little felt balls are now on their string, waiting for december 1. ::

more rainbow things i'd like to make

ideas 1, 2 and 3 from here

idea 1: homemade bath paints - just mix food dye and shaving cream!

idea 2: recycled crayons - just combine bits of half-used crayons in a muffin tin and melt in the oven. big sister is still going with the crayons she already has, but when we get down to a bunch of stubs, i'll definitely be making some of these.

idea 3: homemade finger paints. this picture speaks for itself really. though i have to admit these paints look fun in a "let's go outside, away from the carpet and couches, and do this wearing our least precious clothes" kind of way...

idea 4: perhaps something for next year. found here.

just because

because putting cake in your belly button is more fun than putting it in your belly
because my house seems to have a strange sort of mess equilibrium (and i cleaned up my room last night, so of course tiny chocolate cake crumbs were going to end up in the carpet!)
because i needed that extra something to add to my pile of wet undies for washing

potty training day 1

wees on the potty: 0
poos on the potty: 0
successful trips to the supermarket with apprehensive father: 1
total nappies still used for the day: 2
accidents on the living room floor: 2
overall mood: enthusiastic

advent 1: the jesse tree

observing the season of advent in the lead up to christmas day helps me, and this year my family as well, to remember and mull over what it is we're really celebrating at christmas - the birth of Jesus Christ, our Saviour and King, who came to make peace between God and this broken world. someone at church pointed out recently that taking the time to observe advent keeps them from heaping all their expectations for christmas meaningful-ness onto christmas day - a day that can often be busy and tiring, as well as enjoyable.

one kid-friendly way that we're going to wander through advent this year is by making a "jesse tree." it is named for jesse, the father of king david, the human king who pointed forward to Jesus in many ways. in particular, the name and idea come from isaiah 11, which begins:

'a shoot will come up from the stump of Jesse; from his roots a Branch will bear fruit...'

(that shoot is Jesus, and the chapter goes on to describe what kind of king Jesus will be and what life will be like under his kingship.)

the idea of a jesse tree is that you walk chronologically through the old testament of the bible, from adam through to Jesus, focusing on one person a day and considering how they point forward to Jesus. each person is represented by a symbol (eg. noah's symbol is a rainbow) and their significance expressed in a relevant bible passage. your symbols and tree can look however you want them to - i've just drawn some little cartoon pictures onto cardboard circles this year, which we will hang on some sticks from our yard (classy, i know). we will read our bible passages from a children's bible, and focus just on the person and their story. when the girls are older, we can begin to talk about the ways each person's story points forward to Jesus, but for now that will be something just for me to ponder as i pace the driveway with little sister in the pram.

:: in other news, happy 6 month birthday, little sister! and big sister is currently running around wearing big girl undies, wiping dolly's bottom with toilet paper and hoping to earn the first sticker for her potty training poster. ::

our pattern of christmas giving

big sister "helping" little sister find her way around her new water cup...

we (well, technically i, but on behalf of we, since i've been the only one with enough head-space to be pondering such things during the last couple of months) have decided to establish a pattern of christmas giving for our family, to guide our purchasing habits and our (especially the girls') expectations into the future.

each year, husband and i will give our kids a present for the whole family to share - this year, that is the little play kitchen from yesterday's post. we will then also give each child some books and something handmade - this year, i'm making the girls some clothes. we want our family to see and experience christmas as a time for simple, thoughtful living, just like the rest of the year. we especially want to make sure that the generosity shown at christmas time is not confused with or an excuse for greed - in terms of the amount our children expect to receive, but even more so about what we decide to buy for them. we also hope that by the "main" present being communal, we can help foster in our children a healthy personal detachment to their stuff and that sharing for them will become as natural as breathing.

i am already grateful for this pattern we have chosen, as it has helped me defeat several "keeping up with the jones's" kind of thoughts - "no, big sister does not need a balance bike this christmas, just because her 2 little besties each have one - then she'd probably ignore the 2 bikes she already has and loves!" i still have a lot to learn for myself about fighting the constant urge to get more stuff, but i'm hoping that i can learn and teach simplicity simultaneously...

:: on another note, yesterday husband completed the last requirement for his masters, and today little sister has commenced eating solids (pear). beginnings and endings. ::

rainbow things i'd like to make

these cupcakes are so wrong, yet so right. (should food be this colour?) would love to make them for a rainbow-themed 3rd birthday party for big sister next year, though perhaps i'd ditch the jars. found here.


i have the felt balls already, and hope to make a garland like this in time for december 1. found here.

we've got plenty of old t-shirts i could use to weave a beauty like this for the girls' room. this is a "maybe some day..." kind of project. found here.


this is what i'm making the girls for christmas this year, though ours will be turquoise with a rainbow mosaic tiled splashback. found here.

child-wrangling

this is big sister "sleeping" out the front of our house. last night, she snuck out the front door just before bed-time and refused to come back inside. when husband asked her if she'd like to sleep outside, she gleefully said, "yes!" and lay down on the ground, promptly beginning her thumb-sucking, hair-twirling bed-time ritual. (perhaps we should take this girl camping?) after some coersion, husband convinced big sister to come back inside, but these battles of the will are becoming more common of late as she embraces life as a two-year-old.

i've begun reading a couple of books, to help me/us think through our approach to managing challenging behaviour from our kids (as we face the inevitable reality that stubborn mules of parents such as ourselves will have stubborn progeny.) i think my current approach is to be super-patient and "understanding" and hope that big sister eventually decides to do what i want her to, but when that doesn't work i just end up angry and using physical force (not smacking, just picking her up and taking her where she needs to go) to make her do what i want her to. turns out her stubbornness can outlast mine (grrr...) this volcano approach is not really working for me, but since big sister is on the whole not a difficult kid, it has sufficed til now.

first i began reading gary chapman and ross campbell's book, 5 love languages of children, but it made me feel kind of, well, crap. so i've put it aside for later. (isn't that a good approach to anything in life that makes you feel bad?!) i'm thinking now that the reason it made me feel bad was that it kind of describes what i've already been doing (trying to "love" my girl into doing what i want her to through vast amounts of patience and tolerance) and what isn't helping me to get her to let me buckle her into her car seat or the pram without feeling like a psych nurse restraining a patient.

so now i'm reading the new dare to discipline by james dobson, which is all about addressing said battle of the wills. i'm feeling much more confident already, and this is helping me to take effective action much earlier (before i begin to unravel in an angry mess) when big sister tries to take me on. there is some discussion of the use of smacking (as the biggest discipline gun of them all, never to be used when you're angry), and i'm still not sure what i think about that. mostly opposed, i think.

anyway, would love to hear any recommendations on good child-wrangling books!

contemplation

:: i've been feeling lately that my blog has become more of a shrine to my girls, than a window into our real life. so i'm going to start sharing a few more of my thoughts, alongside the images of my lovely daughters. hope that's okay by you! ::

little sister's current preference for falling asleep during the daytime only when she is pushed in a figure-8 motion in our driveway has given me plenty of time for contemplation. and husband's focused study effort during the last month has given me plenty of tv-free evenings in which to read. so i've been pondering many questions - too many to present in a single post - about advent, christmas, healthy eating, child-wrangling, a godly attitude to discontent, and what i can only describe as a natural approach to childhood. through the coming weeks, i hope to share my thoughts and remaining questions with you here.

since you've made it this far, i'll reward you with a photo of big sister enjoying a natural approach to childhood - might i add that this was her idea, i'm no slave-driving mother!

delighting in the sunshine

from the weekend: baking

style icon

summer pyjamas, thongs with socks, wooden beads
my little style icon

belated post: the baptism of little sister

a week and a half ago
little sister was baptised
at our church
surrounded and supported
by family and friends.

to little sister, we said:

God has brought you out of darkness
into his marvellous light.
Shine as a light in the world
to the glory of God the Father.
God has called you into his Church.

We therefore receive and welcome you
as a member with us of the body of Christ,
as a child of the one Heavenly Father,
and as an inheritor of the kingdom of God.

Amen.

singalong

gathered around the piano
we sang and played
as many nursery rhymes
as we could remember.

big sister kept up marvellously;
her language and memory astound me.

singing together
quashed the anger
rising in my chest
after an afternoon
of unreasonable demands.